When the Lights Went Out?

On Friday, June 29^th, I was laying in bed freshly showered – practically depleted from the activities of the week. My plan was to lie in bed and watch Bill Maher as I drifted off to sleep. Yes--I know it was an action packed Friday night fit for a 27 year old, lol! After chatting it up with KJ for an hour, I hopped onto Twitter one last time. Much to my surprise, I began to see tweets such as “Praying for my folks in Baltimore & DC” and “DMV stay safe.” Completely baffled, I continue to read my timeline until I saw a tweet that said “Thunderstorms with 91 MPH winds headed towards DC & Baltimore.” YIKES!!

Just as my Twitter timeline had predicted, the storms arrived. However not only did they come, those storms showed up and SHOWED OUT! For the first time in my life I was genuinely afraid of the sound of thunder and the strikes of lightening. I asked Jesus to be roof protection and a generator for my house and drifted off to sleep. *Chuckles* When I awoke the next morning, I learned that millions of homes in the area were without electricity. Thankfully, I still had power and the roof was still attached to my house. I guess God heard my prayer, lol!  I went to grab my phone to do my customary morning social media check and noticed that my iPhone was not loading. I grabbed my iPad, and nothing. I turned on my television, nothing. My internet and cable services were out--obviously affected by the storm.

And so it began—what would ultimately be several days without telecommunications services. What in the world was I going to do without Internet access? I NEEDS my Internet!! No, really I do! I own thousands of dollars of Apple products that are useless without Internet. The days continued to pass with no Internet, no cable, and no phone. Every night I would come home and lie in the bed and end up going to sleep early because there was nothing else to do. I could have organized my other bedrooms that are in disarray. I could have hung photos that I have been meaning to hang. But I didn’t do either of those things; I went to sleep. Until last night.

Last night I really thought about what the lesson could be in this. Why did the Universe strip me of these distractions for a few days? What should I be doing instead? It hit me--and just like that…I started it. I started what I had been putting off for months, maybe even years. I am not ready to share this thing yet, but you guys will find out soon, I promise. And I kid you not, within 15 minutes of my starting my delayed task; I heard a familiar sound – an iPad alert! My internet was restored. Then I turned on the television and there was Usher dancing around my screen on VH1Soul. Ha! The Universe is funny. God is funny. I just had to take that step and act.

During your moments, hours or days without electricity or internet, did you stop to think about what you could be doing instead of complaining? Did you play games with your children? Talk with your spouse? Make a plan for the future? Walk/Run a mile? Finish a book? Did you do something? Anything?! Sometimes the Universe has to take drastic measures to get our attention. Last Friday’s storm caused major headaches and uncomfortable situations for many, but maybe it sparked something inside of you. Nature snatched away everyday luxuries that we often take for granted. And I, for one, am glad that when the switch was flipped back on, I wasn’t in the same place that I was 5 days ago. I hope you aren’t either!

Here’s to our new journeys!

A

Timing, Timing, Timing

We always hear the cliché saying, “timing is everything.”  Timing, timing, timing…

Today was Father’s Day – a holiday until this year was never on my radar. Growing up without a father figure, I never celebrated the day.  This year Father’s Day would be different,I had decided to build on the momentum of my budding relationship with my father and send him a gift.

After consulting with my mom, sisters, several closefriends, and family members, from my father’s side, I had decided on the perfectgift. Last weekend, I sat down in my basement with my boof boof (best friend)and my mom. We gathered pictures from every stage of my life to build a 20-page scrapbook. There were pictures from every stage of my life – birth, elementaryschool, middle school, high school, proms, graduations, college, major birthdays, my 1^st home, etc. The last page of the scrapbook was ablank page that simply said, “To be continued…” 

Sample Pages from "The Scrapbook"

Timing, timing, timing…

The days the scrapbook was in the possession of FedEx, I was a nervous wreck. The fear of rejection and the thought of disapproval of the gift were making me sick. I was literally sick for two days. Despite thereassurance from everyone, I was preparing myself for the worst.

As I looked back over my journey with developing the relationship with my father, it started around the time my grandmother’s health began to deteriorate. Eighteen months later, on the 1-year anniversary of mygrandmother’s passing, I was celebrating the marriage nuptials of my littlesister. My grandmother is gone. I am celebrating with my father’s side of thefamily. My grandmother is gone. I am celebrating with my father’s side of the family.  I had to keep repeating it to myself, because it was truly a surreal moment.

Timing, timing, timing…

All my life, I looked forward to the moment that I could knowmy father’s side of the family and develop those relationships. The more Ithought about it God timed it for my relationship with my father to spark atthe perfect point in my life when I would I need it the most. In order to fillthe void left by my grandmother’s passing, God gave me a whole new family.  

On Father’s Day 2012, my father called me to thank me forthe scrapbook and to say that he was extremely pleased with the gift. **insert huge grin ** He loved it! He loved my gift! I am so blessed that I am beinggiven the opportunity to start this journey. Hopefully from this point forward, I won’t have to document any major life events in a scrapbook. We can both continue this journey together!

A

You Gotta Have Faith?

Sometimes in life, it seems as though everything in the world just goes wrong. One thing after another -- nothing in the universe seems to be going as planned. Yesterday, a loved one told me that they had “hit rock bottom.” When I heard those words escape the lips of their mouth, I instantly thought, “rock bottom, hmm.” Yes their current situation is stressful and not ideal, but rock bottom? I didn’t think so.

When things don’t seem to be going your way and nothing seems to be going as well as you hoped, it’s the universes’ way of grabbing your attention. Sometimes it can be something small like a broken ankle or not knowing how the bills are going to get paid. Every action in your life is happening to make you aware of something that needs change. Maybe God needed you to sit and be still, hence your broken ankle. Or maybe God needed you to appreciate what you currently have in your possession and end your need of wanting more, so there is not enough money to go around to cover your bills.

In my young life, I have learned God takes you to a situation to deliver you from your situation. It seems like things keep getting worse, but in the midst of that turmoil could be your next blessing. If you know me, you are probably reading this thinking this post uncharacteristically “religious." :) However, my elders taught me to not only have faith in God, but to also continue to work in God. One cannot have faith if they worry. Faith cannot exist harmoniously with doubt. When trouble comes, don’t get frustrated and give up – I encourage you to have faith and know that your next blessing could quite possibly be on the other side of the obstacle.

A

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

- Hebrews 11:1 KJV

Who’s Having Good Sex?

Everywhere I turn there is a conversation about sex – Who’s having it? Who isn’t? Is it good? Is it wack? The desire for more sex: in both quantity, and more importantly quality, seems to be lying under the surface everywhere I turn. Seriously! There is not one conversation that I have had with a single girl friend recently that did not make a turn to our need for consistent good sex. There seem to be so many single women with unfulfilled needs. Old man winter finally showed up and there is no penis meat in our beds to keep us warm. I mean really: Where in the hell is the BEEF? Lol

It seems both men and women are affected by this shortage of quality relations. This past weekend, in two separate conversations with friends/associates, I was blown away by their admissions of having lackluster sex lives. 

The first of these conversations lent itself to an acquaintance suggesting that he doesn’t get head from his fiancée on a consistent basis, and that when it does occur, it is lackluster.  I was thinking to myself, “Wow, a woman can get a ring without giving great head?...” I was truly in a baffled state. It was like he told me he saw pigs fly. It just didn’t make sense to me.

In the other conversation, a friend admitted that her ex-boo thang, proclaimed that his favorite sexual position was missionary.  HOW BORING! The whole table let out a simultaneous deep sigh that was drenched in condolences. Now we see why he is an ex, right?! Lol!

Is anyone having good sex? Can you have mind-blowing sex and a good relationship with the same person? Or does one have to choose good sex with someone temporary over an amazingly healthy relationship? Why can’t both be achieved with the same person?

Or is the real question: Is lackluster/boring sex better than no sex at all? I am not quite sure that is a question I am ready to tackle.

A